There is FREEDOM in knowing everyone is responsible for their own thoughts and feelings.
You don’t want to return texts,
You don’t wish to exchange Christmas gifts,
You don’t want to participate in Friendsgiving,
Or family Thanksgiving.
You don’t have to.
At all.
Zero obligation.
You may think, but
They’ll think I’m rude.
I’m ruining the fun.
I’m wrecking their holiday.
They will be upset.
It is not your responsibility to make someone else feel a certain way.
You can’t make someone else feel a certain way.
I’m picturing The Bear Christmas episode.
[Spoiler Alert]
Everyone can be there.
And it can still be a complete disaster.
No one could “make” their mom feel better.
True, there were other factors at play in this episode, but apply this scenario to your own life.
When have you done everything you can to make someone feel a certain way, to no avail?
You get to decide for yourself (& your family) what cultural norms you do & don’t want to ascribe to.
Decide for yourself, and then know and like your reasons.
I don’t want to return this text because I want more quality time with my family.
I don’t wish to exchange Christmas gifts because it’s stressful and costly.
I don’t want to go to Friendsgiving because we’re overwhelmed with our commitments and schedule.
Please note that these reasons are for clarity, not because you have to explain it to someone else. You can if you want to, but that is also not required.
They can think these things (you’re rude, you’re ruining the fun & you’ve wrecked their holiday), and you will still be OK.
You will be spending more time with your family; you’ll have less stress, more money, and more time.
And they will be OK, too.
They can figure it out, learn to have fun anyway, and have complete responsibility for their thoughts and feelings.
If you are tired of doing things for everyone else…
If you’re over being “guilt-tripped” into submission…
If you know what you want but need help sticking to it…
I can help you be free.
The first step is to book a consultation with me here.
Reminder: as part of the benefits offered at Logan Health Whitefish, employees get free coaching sessions. They can book an in-person coaching session here, or a remote/Zoom coaching session here.
