under-living

Are you under-living? 

It might look like: 

~ a job you don’t love. 

~ relationships that are more stressful than joyful. 

~ travel you’re not taking. 

~ time you’re not spending doing what you love to do. 

~ feeling like a robot going from one required task to the next. 

You’re so annoyed with where you’ve wound up, with what you’re doing with your one wild and precious life. 

(You hate to admit that you feel like you might be wasting it.) 

You want more. 

You have dreams. 

You wish you could just step out of your life into a different one. 

Or maybe you like most of your life if only you could

~ be a better parent. 

~ have a different body. 

~ be a better manager. 

~ feel more confident. 

~ make more time. 

~ have a better marriage. 

~ feel in control of your life at large. 

~ could have more excitement & adventure like you used to. 

You feel stuck, frustrated, disappointed, and discouraged, and you have basically given up on remembering what you love to do. 

You want to make changes, but it feels overwhelming. 

You worry that it may not be possible for you. 

You don’t know where to start. 

You don’t know what to do. 

You don’t follow through. 

You aren’t consistent. 

So things just stay the same. 

Even though you so desperately want a different experience for yourself, your life, and your family. 

Please know that under-living is optional. 

You can opt-out.

And opt-in to living a life you truly love. 

It IS possible. 

You can have all of those things—be a better parent, have a better body, be a better manager, feel more confident, make more time, have a better marriage (have better relationships), feel in control of your life, have more excitement and adventures—live a life you love. 

And here’s the kicker– nothing outside of you has to change. 

It starts with you, just you, and your brain—where you choose to focus and how you choose to manage your mind. 

If you want to learn how, book an appointment or set up a consultation. We’ll discuss what you’re looking for specifically, and I’ll tell you how coaching can help. Then, the fun part—we’ll get to work creating a life you love. 

Go from this:

To this:

jealousy

Jealousy often gets a bad rap. It’s usually seen as a negative emotion that breeds resentment and unhappiness. But what if we could flip the script on jealousy and view it as an indicator of our own desires and aspirations? Instead of letting envy fester, we can use it as a catalyst for personal and professional growth. Here’s how this unconventional take on jealousy could play out in your life.


Imagine you’re a nurse who feels jealous of a colleague who recently received a promotion to a managerial position. Instead of stewing in resentment, recognize that this jealousy is highlighting your own desire for career advancement. You want to be recognized for your hard work and dedication, too. Use this realization as motivation to seek out leadership training, take on more responsibilities, or speak with your supervisor about your career goals. By doing so, you can position yourself for future promotions and achieve the professional success you crave.


If you are a physician, you may feel envious of a fellow doctor who perfectly balances their demanding job with a vibrant personal life, including ample family time and engaging hobbies. This jealousy reveals your own yearning for a better work-life balance. Start by assessing your current schedule and identifying areas where you can delegate tasks or streamline processes. Prioritize self-care and set boundaries to ensure you have time for personal interests and family. By making these changes, you can enjoy a more fulfilling and balanced life.


Perhaps you’re a medical technician who feels jealous of another technician with specialized skills that lead to more interesting assignments and higher pay. This envy is simply your inner voice telling you that you want to develop your own expertise. Look for opportunities to attend workshops, earn certifications, or take advanced courses in your field. By enhancing your skills, you’ll open doors to exciting assignments and greater recognition.


As a healthcare assistant, you might envy a colleague attending a prestigious continuing education program or medical school. This jealousy points to your own aspirations for further education and career advancement. Research educational opportunities that align with your interests and goals, and take steps to apply for programs or scholarships. Investing in your education will pave the way for a brighter and more rewarding future.


Imagine you’re a junior doctor feeling jealous of an experienced doctor who has a strong rapport with patients and is often requested by name. This envy indicates your desire to build similar relationships with your patients. Focus on developing your communication skills and empathy. Take time to listen to your patients and understand their concerns. By doing so, you’ll build trust and rapport, becoming a beloved and respected doctor in your own right.


If you’re a healthcare researcher feeling envious of a peer who frequently publishes in high-impact journals and is invited to speak at conferences, this jealousy highlights your ambition for academic recognition. Channel this energy into your own research projects. Collaborate with colleagues, seek mentorship, and dedicate time to writing and submitting your work for publication. By committing to your research, you’ll gain recognition and make significant contributions to medical knowledge.

The key to transforming jealousy into action is to recognize it as a signal of your own desires. Once you’ve identified what you want, take proactive steps to achieve it.

  1. Assess: Reflect on what specifically triggers your jealousy. What does this person have that you want?
  2. Plan: Define what achieving this desire looks like for you. Set specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals.
  3. Implement: Develop a plan to work towards your goals. This might include seeking additional training, networking, or making lifestyle changes.
  4. Commit: Remember that achieving your dreams takes time and effort. Stay committed to your goals, and be patient with yourself.

By turning jealousy into a driving force for positive change, you’ll not only make your dreams come true but also experience additional benefits:

You’ll feel more energized as you work towards your goals.
Your self-improvement will help you grow personally and professionally.
Achieving your desires will lead to a greater sense of fulfillment and happiness.
Focusing on your own growth rather than comparing (and despairing) yourself with others can lead to healthier and more positive relationships.
You can inspire those around you to pursue their own dreams and aspirations.

Jealousy does not have to be a problem. Instead, you can view it as a powerful indicator of what you want in life. By recognizing and acting on these desires, you can transform envy into action and create a fulfilling and successful life.


Reminder: as part of the benefits offered at Logan Health Whitefish, employees get free coaching sessions. You can book an in-person coaching session here or a remote/Zoom coaching session here

P.P.S. You can register for the next free Christine Seager Coaching Masterclass on How to Change Your Self-Concept by registering here.

collaborate

Are you someone who would like to have a better relationship with someone than you do now? 

Perhaps it’s your direct reports, your teen, or your spouse. 

When they feel safe sharing openly with you, there will be less conflict, tension, and chaos and more connection, cooperation, confidence, and trust. Managing, parenting, and being in a relationship will stop feeling so hard, and you will experience more calm, peace, and joy. 

The first step is to notice when you are triggered. How does it feel in your body? For me, I feel tight and tense. It feels like my blood pressure is rising; maybe my hands are in fists. My heart rate is faster, and my heart is pounding. 

To calm your emotions, get curious. Take a deep breath & think to yourself, “I wonder what happened here.” 

When you’re calm, you can respond intentionally rather than react emotionally. 

When you’re calm, they will be more open to having a conversation with you rather than shutting down. 

Next, find a good time to talk to them and state what you see objectively. 

State the facts, just the facts, with no tone or judgment (which you can do now that you’re being curious). 

My favorite phrase is, “I notice… [state fact].” 

I.E., “I notice a vape pen in your backpack.” 

Or “I noticed you were 20 minutes late to work.” 

These words from you will help them stay open and not defensive because they are not anticipating being in ‘trouble,’ judgment, or anger. 

Next, validate to show understanding. When you normalize what they are feeling, they feel like you understand them, you get them, and they remember that you are on the same team. 

You will reflect back their feeling and acknowledge the situation. 

I.E., “It makes sense that you feel left out when all your friends vape.” 

Or, “It’s understandable that you were 20 minutes late when you discovered that your car door was frozen shut.” 

Important note: this does not mean you agree with or condone their behavior. You are merely validating their experience. 

Then, invite their solution. 

People have an overwhelming desire to do well. We want to have autonomy and figure things out on our own. As managers, we want to ensure they stay within organizational boundaries. As parents, we want to help them build problem-solving skills safely and with our guidance. 

You can do this by simply asking them, “What are you going to do?” 

Your kids might respond by saying they don’t know. You can help them unhinge their inner knowledge by following up with, “I know you are really smart; I bet you can figure this out.” Or you can ask, “What would you tell __ (state their friend’s name here) to do?” This helps separate them from the problem and helps them come up with creative solutions. 

Lastly, make sure they know you are available for support and guidance by simply offering, “I’m here if you’d like help.” 

When you communicate collaboratively, you will be amazed at how much better your relationships can be with less stress, worry, and anxiousness. 


Reminder: as part of the benefits offered at Logan Health Whitefish, employees get free coaching sessions. You can book an in-person coaching session here or a remote/Zoom coaching session here

P.P.S. You can register for the next free Christine Seager Coaching Masterclass on How to Change Your Self-Concept by registering here.

choices

I just had an unplanned, quite uncomfortable, and somewhat unsuccessful medical procedure today that will require more diagnostic testing. 

(Not at LHW, so don’t go thinking it was you, LOL. And don’t worry about me– it’s just my body doing its thing; nothing has gone wrong.) 

Here’s what I didn’t do.

Think: 

“Of course, this happened.”

“This sort of thing always happens to me!” 

“Well, here we go again…”

“If my doctor wasn’t on vacation, this wouldn’t have happened in the first place.” 

“This is never going to end– first this, then there’ll be more and more.” 

“Having this done is making things worse.”

If I were thinking those thoughts, I would feel overwhelmed, hopeless, dismayed, frustrated, and powerless.

They don’t help anything at all. 

If anything, they only make me feel worse: complaining, stewing, dwelling & feeling sorry for myself. 

Here’s what I do think:

“This is just my body doing its thing.” 

“Nothing has gone wrong; this is just what happens sometimes.” 

“I’m glad I have a medical team who can help me while my doctor is on vacation.” 

“I hope my doctor is getting some well-deserved rest & relaxation.” 

“I’ll have more answers soon.” 

“One step at a time. Let’s get this done & then go from there.” 

These thoughts DO serve. 

Not only do they help me feel better, they help me keep a level head. 

I called to schedule that procedure while I drove home. And they were able to get me in first thing the following day. 

(Here’s another thought: I’m so grateful I was able to get in so soon; if I lived in a bigger city, I’d probably have to wait weeks.)

I choose not to spend time thinking thoughts like this, and now, more often than not (over time & with practice), my brain doesn’t even bother to offer thoughts like this. 

(Even for writing this post, I had to purposefully think about what negative thoughts I could think & what might apply- I have to dig for the negative! How amazing is this?!) 

How do you go through life when not-so-great circumstances come up for you? 

Do you lose your marbles? 

Do you yell & scream & jump up and down? 

Do you shake your fist at the indecency of the universe? 

If you choose to live this way, that’s cool—I’ll still love and support you. 

But I want you to see that it IS a choice, and there is a better way. 

And if you want, I can help you with that. 

Now let me know what questions you have. 

*To be clear, I’m not advocating going along mindlessly with whatever anyone recommends for you. Make informed decisions and advocate for yourself. Keeping a level head and coming from a better-feeling place will help with this, too.


This is how you create & live a life you love.

There are a few ways you can work with me, but the first step is to book a complimentary, no-obligation consultation here.

Reminder: Logan Health Whitefish offers free coaching sessions to employees as part of their benefits package. To book, click how you’d like to meet below.

Hey, one more thing. You can register here for the next free Christine Seager Coaching Masterclass (via Zoom) on How to Change Your Self Concept on July 17, 2024, at 11 AM MT.

stuck in a rut

If you’re someone who feels stuck in a rut, this one is for you. 

I was recently revisiting Gretchen Rubins’ book The Happiness Project. When I read, “I wasn’t depressed, and I wasn’t having a midlife crisis, but I was suffering from midlife malaise– a recurrent sense of discontent and almost a feeling of disbelief… Is this really it?” 

She went on, “… though at times I felt dissatisfied, that something was missing, I also never forgot how fortunately I was… I had everything I could possibly want– yet I was failing to appreciate it. Bogged down in petty complaints and passing crises, weary of struggling with my own nature… I wasn’t as happy as I could be, and my life wasn’t going to change unless I made it change.” 

This. This was me in 2018. I could NOT figure out what was missing from my life. 

It turns out it was me, and in time, I learned that:

~ I was not stuck; I had more control over my life than I thought. 

~ I was not appreciating what I had, instead of choosing to seek the good in my everyday life.

~ And I was not expanding that by taking a few seconds or even a minute to soak it all in– absorbing it into my core. 

So, if you are someone who feels stuck in a rut– what can you do differently? 

Start with the things listed above, but then also:

Switch things up by driving a different route to work, pick up a new activity (or rediscover an old one), and reach out to family or friends to connect with. 

You can meet new people and offer to meet someone for coffee, join a gym, or other group of like-minded people. 

You might like to start with a clean space, so declutter your home, workspace, or closet. 

Just try different things until you find the things you like to do. 

I recently signed up for Flathead Area Mountain Bike’s Women’s Clinics. My family was shocked and asked why I suddenly wanted to start mountain biking. My bike is 20 years old and I can probably count on two hands how many times I’ve mountain biked in those 20 years, but I wanted to do something different. I also thought I might like it better if I learned how to mountain bike properly. And, I’m in better shape than I have been; I now have more stamina. (I know what they mean when they say it’s time in the seat. They’re talking about building muscle, which takes time and consistency.) 

I’m loving it. It’s challenging mentally and physically. Am I still sometimes getting frustrated with what I can’t do? Sure, but I’m able to take it in stride. 

I recently also bought a 1000-piece puzzle. I seriously dislike that thing. I don’t understand it; it’s really hard; all the pieces and colors look the same. I really didn’t know what I was getting into when I bought it. And now I know- I will either not be buying another puzzle again, not buying one this hard, or at least knowing what I’m getting into if/ when I commit to one again.

If you feel stuck in a rut, decide to do something different and go after it. You will either love it or learn that you don’t, and you will no longer feel like you’re stuck in that rut. 


no, without guilt

Are you feeling overworked or overwhelmed? Do you struggle to say no? Then this is for you.

You already know you perform incredible work. Your dedication to helping others is inspiring, and your job can be rewarding and challenging. However, it can be difficult to maintain a healthy work-life balance—you’re pulled in far too many directions.

Setting boundaries, saying no, and making time for things you enjoy are essential, but how do you do that?

You know saying no is a one-word sentence, but you keep thinking about your co-workers who will have to work short-staffed. You feel guilty saying no, but you’re also drained; you’ve got nothing left. You’re annoyed at the person who called and asked you to work in the first place—as if they threw a “guilt bomb” on your day. You’re annoyed at the “system” because nurses “always” have to work like this. You’re annoyed at yourself because you struggle to say no.

But what if there was another way?

You can say no and not feel guilty.

You do this by finding different thoughts and directing your brain to focus there.

They will be OK; they know this is part of the job when they sign up to be nurses.

If I take a day off, I will be a better person—less exhausted—and better able to care for myself, my family, and my patients.

By recovering from my stretch on, I will have more staying power.

You can say no and still be kind, respectful, and loving towards your co-workers.

While it’s easy for caregivers to think they’re responsible for everything and everyone around them, that is simply not true. You can take care of yourself and let others be responsible for their thoughts and feelings.

Saying no without guilt will help you reduce burnout, sleep better, decrease stress, increase job satisfaction, improve patient care, have better focus and attention, build better work relationships (no one wants to work with a crabby co-worker), and allow you to be a better person for everyone around you.


P.S. as part of the benefits offered at Logan Health Whitefish, employees get free coaching sessions. You can book an in-person coaching session here or a remote/Zoom coaching session here

boredom

When we feel the restlessness of boredom, we think something has gone wrong.

Just because we have a million things to do doesn’t mean we are interested in or excited to do them. 

We’ve forgotten many mundane tasks are required to run a successful life and business. 

Food shopping, cleaning, cooking dinner, doing laundry, for example, or 

Bookkeeping, payroll, client documentation, or writing newsletters… 

I don’t know many people who are innately excited to do these things. 

(Do you? If so, send them my way; I want to know how. LOL) 

Not all of life is exciting or amazing, and that’s OK. 

You can dial up the fun by asking yourself: if this could be more fun, what might that be? 
~ listening to podcasts while shopping at Costco
~ having a dance party while cooking dinner 
~ listening to rap music while writing your client notes

It seems like such a minor thing, but it can be so draining when your brain constantly tells you something is wrong because you’re bored of life. 

So instead, create more fun. 

If you’d like to learn more tips and tricks like this, join me on Wednesday, 5/8, at 11 AM MT for How to Take Action.

You can register here.

I’ll see you there.

Screenshot

“Difficult” patients

As a healthcare professional working in a hospital or clinic, you are faced with many challenges, one of which is dealing with patients who may not always treat you with kindness, calmness, or patience. These interactions can be emotionally draining, leaving you feeling frustrated, exhausted, and overwhelmed. It is helpful to take measures to protect yourself from their negativity.

One empowering way to do so is by using grounding techniques. These are simple strategies that not only help you stay present in the moment but also empower you to remain calm and in control. For instance, you may focus on your breath, feeling the air moving in and out of your body, or concentrate on a physical object, like a pen, an alcohol pad, or a picture on the wall.

By staying clear, grounded, and level-headed, you can avoid getting caught up in the fight-or-flight mode, a natural response to stress that can lead to burnout and exhaustion. When you are in fight-or-flight mode, your body releases adrenaline and cortisol, making you feel anxious, irritable, and unable to think clearly. Grounding techniques, such as focusing on your breath or a physical object, can help regulate these stress hormones, promoting a sense of calm and clarity.

By grounding yourself, you can activate your prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain responsible for decision-making, problem-solving, and creativity. When you are grounded, you can think more clearly, make better decisions, and provide superior patient care, boosting your confidence in challenging situations.

So, the next time you encounter a challenging situation with a patient, take a moment to ground yourself. Use your breath or a physical object to stay present and focused. Remember, you have the innate ability to remain calm and in control, even in the most stressful situations. This reassurance can protect you from burnout and provide better patient care.


Join our next FREE Masterclass on ‘How to Take Action’ and learn practical strategies from Christine to overcome the root causes of inaction and achieve your goals. You will also learn how to balance client care, administrative tasks, and personal development while prioritizing your own well-being. Sign up now and take the first step towards a more productive, fulfilling, successful, and sustainable practice.

lead

For all leaders (or those aspiring to be), it’s not uncommon to feel overwhelmed by fears, doubts, and worries, especially when “performing” in front of others. You may want to appear confident and assured but are concerned that your true feelings may be exposed.

To tackle this problem, you need to decide how you want to present yourself as a leader, whether in a meeting, to your staff, or in any other role. Embrace your emotions and lead from that place. By being open and confident, you can make a significant difference in how you approach your role as a leader.

If you lead from a place of vulnerability and authenticity, you will show your team that it’s okay to make mistakes and that it’s natural to be human. This can create a sense of safety and trust within your team, leading to greater collaboration, innovation, and success. It’s essential to remember that you don’t have to have all the answers as a leader, and it’s okay to ask for help or admit when you don’t know something.

At the same time, when you lead from a place of confidence, you show your team that you believe in yourself and them. You set the tone for your team’s culture and create an environment that fosters growth and development. When you lead with vulnerability and confidence, you make a well-rounded approach to help your team thrive.

By following this advice, leaders can transform their approach and create a positive culture within their team. When you lead from a place of vulnerability and confidence, you can create a safe, valued, and supported atmosphere for everyone. This can lead to greater engagement, productivity, and satisfaction for both you as a leader and your team members.

As a leader, it’s essential to acknowledge your fears, doubts, and worries, but leading from a place of vulnerability and confidence is equally important. Determine how you want to show up in your role, the next meeting, or for your staff, and embrace that. By leading with authenticity and confidence, you can create a positive culture that fosters growth and success for everyone involved.

tag

What dream, goal, or desire do you have in your heart right now? 

The one that you’re afraid to admit you even want out loud because that’s how terrified you are of it. 

What is it? 

State it. 

Breathe life into it. 

Know that it is safe and OK to want something more. 

Know that you are safe and OK to want more. 

Know that it’s safe & OK to admit your heart’s desire. 

The first step to achieving any goal is to know what you are working towards. 

Step toward with wild abandon. 

Be willing to be uncomfortable. 

This is where most of us get hung up and stop. 

It will not be comfortable, AND also you will be OK. 

If it were easy, everyone would be doing it. 

But while we know logically that it will be challenging, this doesn’t make it easier for us to withstand the discomfort.

Start small. 

Take one step at a time. 

(Any step because there is no one right step- who could even tell beforehand what that would be anyway? You don’t know the ‘right’ step until you’ve taken several steps & found which ones were ‘right.’)

Be willing to be wrong. 

Try different things. 

Evaluate your results. 

Keep going. 

You will inevitably arrive at your dream, goal, or desire.