If you’re someone who feels stuck in a rut, this one is for you.
I was recently revisiting Gretchen Rubins’ book The Happiness Project. When I read, “I wasn’t depressed, and I wasn’t having a midlife crisis, but I was suffering from midlife malaise– a recurrent sense of discontent and almost a feeling of disbelief… Is this really it?”
She went on, “… though at times I felt dissatisfied, that something was missing, I also never forgot how fortunately I was… I had everything I could possibly want– yet I was failing to appreciate it. Bogged down in petty complaints and passing crises, weary of struggling with my own nature… I wasn’t as happy as I could be, and my life wasn’t going to change unless I made it change.”
This. This was me in 2018. I could NOT figure out what was missing from my life.
It turns out it was me, and in time, I learned that:
~ I was not stuck; I had more control over my life than I thought.
~ I was not appreciating what I had, instead of choosing to seek the good in my everyday life.
~ And I was not expanding that by taking a few seconds or even a minute to soak it all in– absorbing it into my core.
So, if you are someone who feels stuck in a rut– what can you do differently?
Start with the things listed above, but then also:
Switch things up by driving a different route to work, pick up a new activity (or rediscover an old one), and reach out to family or friends to connect with.
You can meet new people and offer to meet someone for coffee, join a gym, or other group of like-minded people.
You might like to start with a clean space, so declutter your home, workspace, or closet.
Just try different things until you find the things you like to do.
I recently signed up for Flathead Area Mountain Bike’s Women’s Clinics. My family was shocked and asked why I suddenly wanted to start mountain biking. My bike is 20 years old and I can probably count on two hands how many times I’ve mountain biked in those 20 years, but I wanted to do something different. I also thought I might like it better if I learned how to mountain bike properly. And, I’m in better shape than I have been; I now have more stamina. (I know what they mean when they say it’s time in the seat. They’re talking about building muscle, which takes time and consistency.)
I’m loving it. It’s challenging mentally and physically. Am I still sometimes getting frustrated with what I can’t do? Sure, but I’m able to take it in stride.
I recently also bought a 1000-piece puzzle. I seriously dislike that thing. I don’t understand it; it’s really hard; all the pieces and colors look the same. I really didn’t know what I was getting into when I bought it. And now I know- I will either not be buying another puzzle again, not buying one this hard, or at least knowing what I’m getting into if/ when I commit to one again.
If you feel stuck in a rut, decide to do something different and go after it. You will either love it or learn that you don’t, and you will no longer feel like you’re stuck in that rut.
Reminder: as part of the benefits offered at Logan Health Whitefish, employees get free coaching sessions. You can book an in-person coaching session here or a remote/Zoom coaching session here.
