Do you find yourself putting off tough conversations with employees?
You think: I should have that conversation, but I’ll do it later.
I don’t want to do it now; it will be awkward.
I know it’s part of my job, but I wish it didn’t have to be me.
You continue to procrastinate & avoid it.
You feel increasingly worried and anxious.
You begin to avoid that person, walking the long way to the cafeteria so you have less chance of running into them.
Instead, try this:
What is the emotion you would feel if you had the conversation?
Uncomfortable because you have to have this difficult conversation in the first place.
Frustrated, especially if you’ve had this conversation before.
Disappointed that they haven’t met your expectations.
Worried that you, as their boss, are not doing a good job.
Resentment that their actions might be inconveniencing your team or your facility.
Figure out what emotion would be there for you by finishing this sentence,
“If I had this conversation with them, I would feel ___.”
THEN, see that you won’t die from that feeling.
Be willing to feel that emotion.
It’s OK to feel frustrated, disappointed, worried, or resentful.
Those emotions won’t kill you.
And you can also have a calm, curious, professional conversation with someone about their actions or performance.
The conversation will become easier when you’re willing to face the emotions you are avoiding.